Breakup

The Bering Sea is literally a stone’s throw from the apartment we’re renting. When we moved in the end of March the sea was frozen solid. Yes, salt water will freeze. At 28.4˚ F. 

But now that it’s mid-May the ice is breaking up in massive chunks. Late evenings find kids in tennis shoes and sweatshirts jumping from ice floe to ice floe, riding the flat bergs as they move up and down. Last night the Nome Police stopped to talk to our teens and warn them of the dangers of crushing ice and ask them to stay off the ocean. 

A few days ago the water was mostly flat, but as some ice is washed ashore (some pieces the size of a small car) and other pieces float out to sea, the tides are more visible and the waves are beginning to once again crash on the shore. In fact, I can hear the waves as I sit in my living room. 

This morning I stood mesmerized at the window watching a huge piece of ice, perfectly flat as the waves tumbled it about. First once side would rise into the air, then it would smack down as the wave washed over it. Up and down, ice chunk riding waves like a riderless surf board. 

I’ve felt like that chunk of ice for the last several weeks. Floating along, minding my own business, but getting hammered by waves. Feeling the icy cold water wash over my head when I wasn’t prepared. I’m not sure if I’ll float out to sea or if I’ll be washed ashore. Some kid might even stand on me. A sudden change in wind could alter my direction. 

But I’m not that sheet of foot-thick sea ice tossed around in an ocean of salt water. I’m me. I’m going to sit on the rocks or walk on the beach. I will listen to the waves, but they won’t pummel me. I will watch them, but they won’t drive me out to sea. 

Daniel and the four youngest jump ice floes several evenings ago. 

Instead I choose the room of grace. I’ll turn my back to the sea and its storminess. To its uncertainty. To its exhausting crashes. Today I desperately need the room of grace. I need its quiet. Its deep care for my soul. Its acceptance of my questions. 

The view from my deck just moments ago. Waves crashing. Ice moving. 

The room of grace just invites me to just be. Not do. Not perform. Not decide. Just be. It’s my safe place. And He is there. 

Does your soul feel pummeled? Are there more questions than answers about your future? Your kids? Your job? Or lack of a job? Run to the room of grace. Let your soul sigh. Grace is offered. Embrace it. 

Quote of the day

If a commission by an earthly king is considered an honor, 

how can a commission by a Heavenly King be considered a sacrifice? 

-- David Livingstone

I'm so over-ready for spring. Here are a few shots from this week. . .

I'm here! I'm here. I'm. here. I think I'm here. Am I here?

Yes, I really am still alive. But it's summer. And for us, summer means family vacations (sorry, no pics of that coming), and extra ministry trips, and many, many birthdays. 

The last month has held more quaking of the deep places of my heart than I'm ready to share at this point. But maybe soon. . .  For those closest to me, you already know. For those of you who live farther away and would like to know before I'm ready to blog, just send me an email.

Yup. It's me and my best friend. I love nothing more than to be involved in ministry with Daniel. And God opens windows for that along the way. Last week was one of those.

Daniel and I were privileged to be leaders for the Yellow Bus Adventure, a four day, three night "overnight vacation Bible school" held in Gordon, PA and sponsored in part by FHC Ministries, a group pastored by Daniel's dad, Michael Hobbs. Daniel and I led the music, but were also involved in a campfire story (Daniel told the story of Gideon's Pot-- as first recounted by our dear friend Larry Guthrie) and I did morning coach time (devotions) with all the girls. 

YBA is for kid's in grades 2 through 8, so you can imagine the noise, the smells, the attitudes, the enthusiasm, the needs, the attention spans. Need I say more? 

I love YBA. We had a big mix of kids from church and kids from "town". Kids who know all the Bible stories already, and kids who don't. Kids from homes with a mom and a dad. And kids who have no idea where their dad is. It was incredible to send kids home having memorized Scripture, watched the Scripture acted out in a very memorable way and having learned songs that speak the truth of God's word in a way they'll never forget. 

That's me on the left, then Julie Bradford and my sister (in-law) Esther. We were the paparazzi, each with our own SLR camera, shooting anyone close to us. 

Here's William Straight, director of YBA. We worked with an incredible team!! Wow. So much creativity packed into a short time. 

Team colors!! Staff had black shirts this year, the boys team was green, and blue, yellow and red were girl's teams. 

Ready for YBA: duffle bag, sun visor, flashlight and Bible. 

Josh and Will: our faithful computer geeks. :o) Will has a gift for mentoring the young men around him. Josh is one of those. 

Putting motions to songs brings so much joy to the kids, and helps them to remember the songs. One hymn we did was written by Keith Getty: "Hear the call of the Kingdom". Hopefully it will be posted on youtube soon and I can share it. It was incredible!! 50 children singing "Hear the call of the Kingdom, lift your eyes to the King." And then the chorus: "King of Heaven, we will answer the call! We will follow, bringing hope to the world. Filled with passion, filled with power to proclaim salvation in Jesus name." There were times I could hardly sing, it was so overwhelming. 

chow time!!

adventure time!

Afternoon sports time on a soccer field close by. Tristen and I were waiting for the kids to arrive and Daniel grabbed the camera. :o)

Jake: all ready to run the 100 yard dash!!

The girls with some of their "bestest" friends.

Yes. That's me. The kids love to have adults join in the fun, so I was talked into the long jump. Imagine. No. Don't. 

At YBA we use a point system for everything from Scripture memory to good attitudes and our girls were on the winning red team!! 

Saying goodbye was NOT fun. 

Now, on to our first summertime birthday: Tobin turned 5 on June 23. We celebrated with a family from church whose son turned 14 the same day. With a river close by, what better way to celebrate than with a fire, hotdogs, mountain pies, marshmallows, cake and several hours in the river. Most of the time in the river was spent with snorkel masks on looking for "treasures". You know, things like broken dishes, old tire rims, large pieces of discarded, waterlogged rugs, snail shells, broken clocks. 

Tobin, Tyler and Tristen

And lastly, Grandma Showalter has been a caretaker of roses for as long as I can remember. In March she sent me a rosebush from Jackson and Perkins. It's a hybrid tea rose and has bloomed for the first time. I only wish I could include the smell. It's heavenly. 

That's all for now. There is so much more in my heart to write, but I haven't the time. Maybe soon. 

Favorite photos of April. . . and May

Here is Sophia with a perfect marshmallow. We love fireside suppers. 

A sweet friend from church stopped by as we were finishing our first fireside picnic of the year. As we sat there shivering I had to ask, "Whose crazy idea was it to eat outside anyway?" It was mine. (This one's for you Alice.)

Not staged. Emmy was folding laundry and also trying to read a book. She propped it open with her feet. 

Another tea time, only it was lemonade this time. 

Remember that orange marker I mentioned? See the previous post.

I was chopping onions and Tob's eyes were burning so he needed goggles. 

My lovely chocolate mousse, created by my sweet sister-in-law Esther for my birthday. She and my friend Jules planned a party for me in a "Life is Good" theme. Check out Jake and his goodies HERE. 

And then a most delightful visit from my dear friend Angie. How fun to remember the "good ole' days". I'm so grateful for the friends God has given me: the ones from long ago and the ones who have only recently become friends. 

Movie night trivia: Guess who had a nap and who didn't. 

Elsa at a very cold picnic in our back yard.

These guys LOVE each other!! Most of the time. 

Tristen could have stood by the reservoir for hours just throwing rocks in the water. 

The kids enjoyed the pond at Mom and Dad's house. No, I didn't let them go swimming. It was just too cold. They were wishing. . . 

In April we attended IHC in Dayton and then spent two days at Mom and Dad's house near Columbus, Ohio. Daniel attended a prayer conference. The kids and I enjoyed being with Grandpa and Nana. And playing outside. The girls helped Mom plant strawberries, onions, and a few other things. 

Papa and Tristen come down the stairs this way often. 

Good Friday walk, and other thoughts

We joined with other "believers" on a walk through town on Good Friday. A major in the Salvation Army portrayed Jesus carrying His cross. It was a rather quiet group. A three pound hammer and 3 huge spikes were passed among the walkers. Sometimes there was a clinking sound as the hammer pounded the nails. A small whip was passed down the line as well. 

I couldn't help but think, it was really my hand that held the whip. My hand pounded the nails into the Saviour. The last several weeks have been weeks of testing, and in many ways I've been pretty sure I've failed the test. But when Easter suddenly appeared on my calendar it was a beautiful reminder that Jesus died to redeem my failure. 

Easter Sunday morning always feels like an explosion to me. I find it difficult to stay focused on Good Friday. I want to race ahead to Sunday morning. I know a deep and profound salvation because of the Saviour Who went willingly to the cross, and stayed there until "it" was accomplished and He could cry, "It is finished!" It is finished. Death's sting is gone. Death has died. And we now have life forever. Death has brought life. 

Saturday morning we woke to about 6 inches of snow!

And even in the midst of snow, there are still those delightful signs that spring is just around the corner. . . .

Blessings. . . 

Have a beautiful week, walking with and resting in the Saviour. 

the Breeze that is God

In our adult Sunday School class we're working our way through "Firm Foundations", an intense study from Creation to Christ produced by New Tribes Mission. 

We're now at about lesson 12 and last Sunday talked about the serpent's deception and Eve's taking the bait. I'm more convinced than ever that Genesis 3 is my least favorite chapter in the entire Bible. Every time I read through the Scripture I dread Genesis 3. It gives me a sinking feeling. We blew it. God gave us perfection, and we blew it. God started out with the ultimate life and we messed it up. But that's not really what this post is about. End of rabbit trail. 

The verse that really caught my attention though is verse 8. "And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day. . ."

The word cool also means "breeze, wind, breath" and "spirit of the living". This word "cool" is found 379 times and is translated "spirit" 227 times, "wind" 82 times, "breath" 27 times, various other words the rest of the times, but only once as "cool". 

I began to wonder: What does it sound like when God walks through the garden? What does it sound like when He walks through my garden? 

Psalm 139:7 "Where could I go from Your Spirit? Or where could I flee from Your Presence?" Guess what. That word "Spirit" is the same word as "cool" in Genesis 3:8. 

Then my mind did a mini marathon and arrived at Acts 2:1-2. "And when the day of Pentecost had fully come, they were all assembled together in one place, when suddenly there came a sound from heaven like the rushing of a violent tempest blast, and it filled the whole house in which they were sitting."

There it is again: sound, and wind. Oh, to have the Spirit of the Living God fall fresh on me! The mighty Breeze of God Himself. The sound of God walking in the garden. 

So, when I once again hang laundry out to dry in the Spring, or when I sit on my front porch after a long day, or when I stand high on a mountain top and feel a breeze, I will remember that my God is a Breeze, a Wind. It is His Spirit passing by. Wanting to be near me. Wanting to swirl around me and tease my hair. Wanting to dance beside me. Wanting to remind me of the nearness of Himself. 

That is my God. The sound of my God, walking in the garden.